On the morning show at a radio station in Chicago they
play a
game for prizes usually vacations and such, called "Mate
Match."
The DJ's ring someone at work and ask if they are married
or in a
serious relationship.
If yes, then this person is asked 3 very personal
questions that
vary from couple to couple and asked for their significant
others
name and work phone number. If the significant other
answers
correctly then they are winners.
This particular day it got interesting:
DJ: HEY! This is Edgar on WBAM. Do you know "Mate
Match"?
Contestant: (laughing) Yes I do.
DJ: What is your name? First only please.
Contestant: Brian
DJ: Are you married or what Brian?
Brian: Yes.
DJ:"Yes"? Does this mean your are married?.or what?
Brian?
Brian: (laughing nervously) Yes I am married.
DJ: Thank you Brian. OK, now, what is your wife's
name?
First only please Brian.
Brian: Sara.
DJ: Is Sara at work Brian?
Brian: She is gonna kill me.
DJ: Stay with me here Brian! Is she at work?
Brian: (laughing) Yes she is.
DJ: All right then, first question: When was the
last time you
had sex?
Brian: She is gonna kill me.
DJ: BRIAN! Stay with me here man.
Brian: About 8 o'clock this morning.
DJ: Atta boy.
Brian: (laughing sheepishly) Well.
DJ: Number 2: How long did it last?
Brian: About 10 minutes.
DJ: Wow! You really want that trip huh? No one
would ever have
said that if there weren't a trip at stake.
Brian: Yeah, it would be really nice.
DJ: OK. Final question: Where was it that you had
sex at 8 this
morning?
Brian: (laughing hard) I ummmmm...
DJ: This sounds good Brian where was it?
Brian: Not that it was all that great just that her
mom is
staying with us for a couple of weeks and she was taking
a shower at the time.
DJ: Ooooooh, sneaky boy!
Brian: On the kitchen table.
DJ: "Not that great"? That is more adventurous than
the last
hundred times I have done it. Anyway, (to audience)
I will
put Brian on hold, get his wife's work number and call her
up. You listen to this.
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DJ: (to audience) Let's call Sara shall we?
(touch tones,
ringing)
Clerk: Kinko's.
DJ: Hey, is Sara around there somewhere?
Clerk: This is she.
DJ: Sara, this is Edgar with WBAM. I have been
speaking with
Brian for a couple of hours now
Sara: (laughing) A couple of hours?
DJ: Well, a while anyway. He is also on the line
with us. Brian
knows not to give away any answers or you lose. Soooooooo,
do you know the rules of "Mate Match"?
Sara: No
DJ: Good.
Brian: (laughing)
Sara: (laughing) Brian, what the hell are
you up to?
Brian: (laughing) Just answer his questions
honestly OK?
Sara: Oh, Brian
DJ: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sara I will now ask you 3
questions and if
you answer what Brian has said then the 2 of you are off to
Orlando Florida at our expense. This does include tickets
to
Disney World, Sea World and tickets to see the Orlando
Magic
play. Get it Sara? SARA! GET IT Orlando Magic, they are on
strike Sara "helloooooo" anyone home?!?!
Sara: (laughing hard) YES, yes.
Brian: (laughing)
DJ: All right, when did you have sex last Sara?
Sara: Oh God, Brian...this morning before Brian
went to work.
DJ: What time?
Sara: About 8 I think. (sound effect) DING DING
DING
DJ: Very good. Next question: How long did it last?
Sara: 12,15 minutes maybe.
DJ: hhmmmmm
Background voice in studio: That's close enough. I
am sure she
is trying not to harm his manhood.
DJ: Well, we will give you that one. Last question:
Where did you
do it?
Sara: OH MY GOD, BRIAN! You did not tell them did
you?!?!
Brian: Just tell him honey.
DJ: What is bothering you so much Sara?
Sara: Well, It's just that my mom is vacationing
with us and...
DJ: SHE SAW?!?!
Sara: BRIAN?!?!
Brian: NO, no I didn't...
DJ: Ease up there sister. Just messin' with your
head. Your
answer?
Sara: Dear Lord,..I cannot believe you told them
this.
Brian: Come on honey it's for a trip to Florida.
DJ: Let's go Sara we ain't got all day. Where did
you do it?
Sara: In the ass.
(long pause)
DJ: We will be right back.
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DJ: I am sorry for that ladies and gentlemen. This
is live radio
and these things do happen. Anyway, Brian and Sara are off
to
lovely Orlando, Florida.